My Kid Brother.

The only thing we had in common was our parents. I was the oldest- confident, demanding attention, cracking jokes, and generally getting my way. Anthony was just my kid brother, sensitive, shy, and generally the target of my teasing. I gave him a hard time, he cried, and I got lectured about being kind and setting the example because I was older. I resented that he wasn't tougher and that he was constantly tattling on me. When he got a little older, he started biting back. We spent a lot of time bickering.

We didn't share many interests. Anthony flew his toy airplanes and studied constellations while I set-up Barbie's Dream House and took care of my puppies. Our interests converged for a while when Santa brought Super Nintendo for Christmas in '93. After we finally defeated Bowser together, we mostly went back to our own activities.

We still had periods of camaraderie, just as most siblings do. Sometimes we acted as partners in crime. My dad's successful career led us to a different city every few years, and for those first few weeks after we'd settled into our new home and our new schools, Anthony and I were the only friend each other had. We would play together after school and talk about how much we missed the last city, until we made new friends and went our separate ways again.

We were certainly very different from each other, but not that different from other siblings, I don't think. Lots of siblings fight and argue. Still, I can't help but think the differences weren't really the problem. The problem was probably that I didn't appreciate him.

Anthony and I are still very different.

Anthony is smart. Really, really smart. Mom insists that he's not any smarter than I am, but Moms have to say that. She knows, and I know. Every time we play dominoes I have Anthony count my hand because he can look at a cluster of dominoes and tell me exactly how many dots are on them without counting them. He's like Rain man. He is curious about the world and he spends lots of time reading and figuring things out. He understands politics and knows his geography. He's always been into science, and he certainly has a good grip on history. Sure, sometimes I'm pretty bored by his dinner table conversation, but there's no denying that the kid is smart.

Anthony knows what he believes, and more importantly, why he believes it. He's strong in both his faith and his political position. I tend to shy away from conversations about religion and politics because I'm not great with apologetics and I can't always articulate what I'm thinking. Not Anthony. Anthony will happily and respectfully discuss anything.

There is a difference between having skills and having talent. I like to sew and draw and decorate cakes. These are skills I've learned. Anthony just got his degree from Texas Tech in visual communications. He takes beautiful pictures, shoots professional video footage, and can edit and produce a high-quality video that tells an amazing story and moves people. Right out of college, his very first contract was producing a video for a billion dollar oil company. Anthony has talent.

Anthony has a great sense of humor. Although he comes up with plenty of his own material, he has a memory like a steel trap and he can finish almost any movie line you begin to recite. He knows all the funny movies. He's great with voices and impressions, too. When we are together at Christmas time, I constantly insist that he talk like George Bailey. It's spot on and totally hilarious.

Anthony is also really handsome. I tease him about being "freakishly tall," only because that's the only thing I can tease him about these days. He's a great looking guy. Tall, dark, and handsome. A real catch. Exhibit A:

As if all of that isn't enough, Anthony is a genuinely good guy. He is kind and generous. Several years ago, when he was waiting tables, I caught him sending money to one of our family members who was going through a tough time financially. Anthony was mortified that I found out because he was just trying to help and he wanted to do it quietly, without embarrassing the other person. I could have wept, I was bursting with pride and so humbled by his generosity. I went through a particularly tough time of my own several years ago and when I didn't know who else to call, I called Anthony. I was sobbing, and he spent hours on the phone with me. He knows my secrets, and I trust him with them.


Still, with everything he has going for him, Anthony is humble. Sometimes I still sense insecurity in him, and when I do, it frustrates me just as much as when we were little, not because it reveals weakness, but because the insecurity is unfounded.

There's no sibling rivalry now. I'm not threatened by him, I just appreciate him. Today, Anthony turns 25 years old. I'm glad he's on my team. I'm glad he's my brother.


Happy Birthday, Brother.