Theory

After weeks of total denial, I dragged myself to the store yesterday. Alas, I'm 11 weeks postpartum and simply can't rock last season's bikini again this year. Momma needs a new suit.

I quickly scoured the racks for something modest and supportive, but most of what I found seemed more post-menopausal than postpartum.
The majority of what hung on the racks looked like it would have been perfect for a woman named Ethel who is retiring in Boca. I found a handful of pieces that seemed more age appropriate, but the only sizes left were "Large" and "XL." Why are the larger sizes always the only ones in the store when I go shopping?

And then, it hit me. All the slim girls, who look great in a bathing suit, rush out to the stores at the beginning of the season and buy their "smalls" and "mediums." The gals who enjoy dessert and have skipped a few workouts (me) take weeks to work up the nerve to go try on suits in those horribly lit dressing rooms. By the time we arrive mid-season, only the "L"s and "XL"s remain. That's the only explanation I can think of.